Finding Community in the Unexpected
I spent my entire life feeling like I was invited to the party but wasn't part of the crowd.
I had therapists. I had medical providers involved in my ongoing struggles. I was on a healing journey from a lifetime full of trauma, trying to understand the correlation between mind and body, between physical healing and mental healing. COVID was the first time I had really spent time with myself. It was my first opportunity to invest in myself in a way that didn't require money I didn't have.
But I was doing it alone.
When I saw We Are HER on my Facebook feed, something inside me knew I needed to apply. I nervously drove myself to the 2023 retreat, arriving as one of the first people there, not knowing what to expect.
Finding Community in the Unexpected
What I found at We Are HER was a community that was hard to find anywhere else. A sisterhood I didn't know I was missing.
One of the most profound moments came during the breakaway groups, which are smaller, more specialized sessions where we could go deeper. It was in one of those groups that I realized how much racial trauma I carried from growing up in an all-white family. The experiences I had in those groups helped me organize my life experiences better, understanding what was acceptable and what wasn't. I had things in my life that crossed boundaries, but I had normalized them.
My experience made me realize that what was normal to me at the time was not normal at all. I had normalized so much trauma that the groups made me realize I was more traumatized than I even knew. Trauma had become my normal. That retreat became a pivoting moment, a chance to reclaim what my new normal could be.
A Space Free from Shame
The retreat created something I'd never experienced before: a womb free from shame. A space where I could reclaim my narrative without judgment. Where I could meet people who had similar lived experiences but who didn't see themselves as victims. We rejected that narrative together.
I learned that healing isn't linear. Healing is about moving forward every day. I learned that post-traumatic growth is possible. The narrative of trauma doesn't have to break you.
I formed a very close friendship with another survivor I met at the retreat. We often share the positive things and wins that are happening in our lives. I have other friends I keep in touch with regularly. Even though we aren't all close together geographically, I learned I am not alone. Attending the retreat and meeting others opened my eyes to what actual community really is.
The Power of Transformation
When I came back to volunteer at the retreat this summer, something happened that I'll never forget. My husband brought my trailer and came to pick me up at the end of the retreat. Two of the women who had never had a safe man in their lives before gave him a hug.
Seeing how that space could transform a nervous system so quickly — that they would be able to embrace a man when they had never had a safe one themselves — that's when I truly understood the power of what We Are HER creates.
I left that retreat impressed with myself, knowing I was breaking generational trauma. So many walls came crumbling down in the year I volunteered.
Proof That This Works
Here's what I know: being able to go back and volunteer at the retreat is proof that the retreat works. People leave their families to come. They use their vacation time because it was so transformative. The community at We Are HER gives back, and every year, someone has come back to help. That kind of closed system speaks for itself.
The retreat allows people to be out of their everyday environments. It cultivates that womb free from shame and creates a space to reclaim your narrative. The other resources offered through We Are HER are valuable too. Some of them are things people may not have access to otherwise. Often, transitional needs are overlooked, but We Are HER focuses on those aspects. The community teaches the transition from survival to thriving, bringing people to a point where they are able to thrive in life.
And here's what I believe deeply: the health of society is gained by the health of the individuals in it.
What Your Donation Makes Possible
We Are HER has brought transformative and positive life changes to my life. I am empowering other people now. I am living in abundance. I made the transition from surviving to thriving, and I will continue to help every year I can because it made that much of a difference in my life.
I have defied the odds. I have learned that anything that takes us to our higher selves is prophetic.
And here's what I want you to know: your donation does more than you can even imagine.
For someone like me, donations made it possible for me to attend the retreat. Who knows if I would ever be at the point I am now without it. Some survivors have never really had another person care for them before. We Are HER changes that.
What is safety worth? Especially for someone who never knew it.
It is invaluable.
When you donate to We Are HER, you're creating a space where all survivors feel celebrated, welcomed, and empowered. You're making it possible for someone like me to break generational trauma, to form sisterhood, to move from surviving to thriving.
You're helping us show what post-traumatic growth looks like.
Thank you for being part of this journey. Thank you for making transformation possible.
With deep gratitude,
Chelsie
