Anxiety Attack

Body aches trickle down my spine

Nausea, headaches all the time

Crippled, head over my knees

Mind games that never cease

"Shut up. SHUT UP!" hands over ears

The voices inside won't disappear

Relentlessly playing with me

Replaying the horrors I had to see

Again and again night sweats and fears

He never left and was always here

Cold, salt-filled tears fall down

Body numbed and on the ground

Hands grasp my stomach in pain

Hunched over myself all over again

Can't breathe or catch my breath

Anxiety creeping up my neck

It grabs by the throat and won't let go

Tries to choke me out "God! Oh!"

Screaming out but not heard

All in silence never observed

All I can do is try to sleep

Depleted, mind fucked so deep

Won't shut off because he's there

dark corners of my mind everywhere

Rape relived every time my eyes shut

My body knows he's coming in my gut

Body aches again, anxiety creeping up

Awake or asleep he's always here

Haunting the halls of my mind vividly

Pictures so clear it's almost real

Wait, this is more than a bad dream

"Wake up. WAKE UP!" But I am awake

Graphic images I cannot shake

Mind so loud I just want quiet and peace

Repeating over and over, will not cease

Stomach aches again and cannot stand

Fingers grip my skull to quiet this trend

God's too busy and cannot hear

Screaming, crying out in fear

Still quiet and silence all around

While my mind is a dark playground

I never asked for any of this

But you gave it with a spiteful kiss